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Friday, May 19th, 2006
5:20 pm - ?

Does anyone know the origin of the phrase 

The proof is in the pudding


This lady i work with just said it to me, and it gave me a nasty jolt.

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Friday, May 5th, 2006
12:39 am

I met this girl who i'm going out with tomorrow night named Alissa, and she's cute and super cool but on the downside she told me to check out her myspace to see some pictures of her.. so i figured sure no problem. I click on the link and it turns out to view her pics i have to open my own myspace account. *sigh*. So i did, just my picture nothing else on myspace.. just there so i can look at other peoples myspaces.. then i get this email.. Carmen wants to be your friend. Carmen is really hot and scantily clad so of course I add her. So now i have another cute chick on my friend list. Oh yeahhhhh! So Carmen lives in Houston, and has a whopping 76 friends!! So i'm looking at her friends and they are all attractive young men!!! I mean I really thought Carmen and I had something going with all the time we've put into getting to know one another :(.. So myspace can eat my ass...

So since i haven't updated this sucker in sometime i've gotta say... life's been going pretty good. Don't worry though, Joe is still a slacker who lives with his parents, but I have a date tomorrow and a tolerable job. Basically i work at the library where i boot out teen troublemakers, most of whom are only there for myspace on the computer (i suspect they will find mine trick me into adding them as friends and then flame me mercilessly). I also make sure people don't steal shit, and keep an eye on the crazies who wander in late at night.

Otherwise my life has revolved around decking out my badass level 60 night elf rogue in world of warcraft. We're looking at 5 piece Nightslayer set bonus, Brutality Blade and Offhand: Warblade of the Hakkari.

So.. back to this crappy Smirnoff Green Apple Twisted thing i'm drinking (where the fuck did this stuff come from?) and the Colbert Report!!

current mood: dorky

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Sunday, February 13th, 2005
4:29 pm - Dresden Revisited
Today marks the 60th anniversary of the Bombing raid of Dresden at the end of World War II. Events are being held in Germany to commemorate the tragedy. Chancellor Shroeder has used this day to warn Germans against forgetting history, and to grieve the loss of life and the Nazi reign of terror in his country and in Europe. As he spoke far right protesters organized in Dresden to protest the the raid by allied forces, while comparing the heinous acts of allied forces to those of the Nazi's during the holocaust.

When I realized today was the anniversary, I brought it up with one of my more conservative relatives, whom I first had to explain where Dresden was, who bombed it and then an attempt at why. Probably 135,000 people died in the bombings brought to light by Vonneguts anti-war
novel Slaughterhouse 5. The only real explanation for these acts was to spread terror and bring about a quicker end to the war. My relative refused to believe that America would do such a thing, even after I showed him the article, and several websites detailing the history of the event.

I suppose I'm failing to come to any great conclusion here except to say that I and many other liberal-minded people are often criticized for being "Anti-American" in our viewpoints. Just as I'm sure those Germans who acknowledge their nation did a thing or two to bring the violence of 2/13/45 on themselves were called "Anti-German". Nationalistic viewpoints have simmered down some since 9/11, but we still live in a climate where questioning the motivations and deeds of our government is taken in the same frame by many people as working against our nation's best interests, or wanting to topple our government. Horrible things happen when we fail to ask questions and think for ourselves.

current mood: contemplative

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Saturday, January 29th, 2005
4:43 am - Q*BERT
For the sake of updating here are a few snippets with entertainment value:

Q*BERT ONLINE!!! I was obsessed with this game when I was about 7 years old. Q*Bert was on my lunchbox. I used to beg for quarters to play it, but now I can play it for free online anytime I want:


"The 50 Most Loathesome People In America" by some angry liberal dude. Very Funny.


And to whipe that grin off your face... Heres the Challenger Disaster.



current mood: jubilant

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Thursday, December 9th, 2004
5:00 am - Blood on the Tracks
I sleep with the lights off. Thats when my best ideas hit me, in the dark, lying there. When I don't have a pen.

I was just contemplating writing a letter to my father while lying here, I haven't spoken to him in a couple of years and for no good reason. I don't totally regret it, but lately I've been thinking of him a bit, and drawing a few flaw comparisons. I know we both have a lot of regrets, but I should be grateful that mine are more mendable.

So uncertainty in my life has been resurrected. Spent the last week in various states of seclusion, illness and mild withdrawal. Previous 2 weeks I had a fun filled visit from Gail. I quit my miserable job. My poor roommate .. sigh.. looking for no strings attached.

It must have been great before civilization... kill a wooly mammoth.. take a week off... make love to Raquel Welsch. I may need some rewiring. Shelter from the storm. Song lyrics always dominate the upper levels of my CON-SCIENCE, not usually my own though.

"life is sad, life is a bust, you do what you do, you do what you must". haha

Need to discover the niche reserved for avant-garde gaming fanatics, and their significant others.

"there was music in the cafe's at night, and revolution in the air"

Or instead of killing the woolly mammoth I could get together with a few fellow neanderthals and plant a some carrots, and maybe erect a few huts depending on the weather.

Gail alerted me recently of the existence of junky vegans. Doesn't that seem wrong? or at least not right? Or strange perhaps. Methamphetamines sure.. but no chocolate milk. I'm sure velveeta cheese is a staple for these types.

"You're an idiot babe, its a wonder you still know how to breathe".

An interesting tidbit i picked up in one of the many anthropology courses i took. Neanderthals likely had no direct evolutionary link to modern humans, they are an extinct species. Extinction being a consequence of lack of adaptability.

current mood: mellow

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Thursday, November 4th, 2004
9:35 pm - Not in Canada... yet
This has been a dismal last couple of days. The election was a huge dissapointment. Part of me was prepared for a Kerry defeat, but the reality of it was quite traumatizing, especially since I work with 95% Bushies who cheered in the break room as Kerry gave his concession speech. Fools.

I'm trying to be positive and to think of ways in which America can mend its deep seated divides. Polls show that the greatest motivator for Americans to go to the polls, trumping both terrorism and the economy, were "Moral Values". Which translates into people voting for Bush because they are anti-abortion, and anti-gay, and these 2 issues supercede all the criminal transgressions, environmental degredation, and woefull incompetance this administration puts up on a day to day basis.

I'm convinced any progressive candidate if he intends to win the presidency has to put everything in terms of "what would Jesus do?" Would Jesus start a preemptive war in Iraq on false premises? Would Jesus give taxbreaks to billionaires while those without healthcare waste away? Well, ok, the answer is probably yes according to those who voted for Bush. But then again judging by the actions of many of his followers, Jesus must have been a real JERK. There is a major crisis on our hands. The future health of the world and its civilizations rests in the hands of secularists who care about our environment, and EVERYONE's standard of living vs. the views of religious fundamentalists who see this world and this life as a temporary and of minimal value... I recognize most people fall in the middle and are ambivilent.

Oh, and that progressive candidate has to be from the South.

It gets my blood boiling and I intend to fight!

current mood: infuriated

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Saturday, September 25th, 2004
5:20 pm - Mini-Bill Wennington & The Samurai
This weekend kicks ass!! We finally have internet back after a brutal 3 weeks. Much has transpired. I am employed, and I've just completed 71 hours of work in the last 8 days of brutal manual labor, my feet are blistered, and all my muscles are sore but I'm getting seriously back in shape. And I have the weekend off!!! Working in retail really sucks, but I've got to muscle it out. I have this tendency to always be restless.... "never his mind on where he was, what he was doing" - YODA. Excitement, adventure... Joe craves these things, he is reckless. Did I mention I have the weekend off?!!!

Otherwise Robb and I woke early for some tennis this morning. The court next to us was occupied by a couple of colorful characters. Two middle aged guys we've named Mini-Bill Wennington (who resembles the shitty ex-Bull center), and his scrappy kamakazi adversary, the Samurai!! These two were playing some mad-wicked tennis, and listening to them scream at each other was almost more fun than the game we had going. The Samurai later leaped out of Bill Wenningtons pancakes and sneak attacked him at a local diner.

I just strolled home from my parents house and managed to get a wave and a smile from this really hot Wauconda police lady we've come to know as "Officer Poontang".. classy, i know... then immediately afterwards I crossed paths and flirtateous greetings with a pretty sexy postal lady out doing her route (she doesn't have any creative nicknames yet, but I can assure you they're on the way). I'm really going after the public servants today.

Back to college football.

current mood: high

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Wednesday, August 18th, 2004
8:22 pm - From a laptop 6
damn... laptops take some getting used to.. but I can see the appeal, its nice to be doing this from the living room in front of the tube.

I just got done playing tennis with jay and robb, and the bad news is that I really suck, the good news is I feel completely rejuvinated. Excersize does so much to make a person feel better about everything. I'm not the kind of guy who likes to run, or do pushups or any boring shit like that, I have to be playing a sport, any sport, really is fun to me. I haven't played tennis in like 12 years so I can't feel too bad.

Otherwise, I've been out and about all day with Robb on his day off. Not much new to report, another possible employment prospect on the horizon, *knock on wood* its getting pretty sad.

Goddamn this is a boring entry... i just felt and obligation since a hit was put out on me after not posting the other day. Hopefully this will reduce the heat.

current mood: rejuvenated

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Sunday, August 15th, 2004
6:41 pm - nightmares
Fuck me. Last night I was surrounded by giant South American serpents who before constricting and attempting to devour me, projectile vommitted Jon Voight in my direction. Shit.

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Saturday, August 14th, 2004
1:01 am - Prenuptual Fortune Cookies
Todays peek event was Chinese Buffet lunch with Robb. Fortune cookies have been cruel to me as of late. Last time we had Chinese, Robb got the "You will inherit a large sum of money" cookie <--- which already happened to him, while I got something like "you will die poor and lonely", which of course was somewhat disheartening. But not today!!! Today I landed the "A Golden Egg of Opportunity falls into your lap this month" cookie, and my lucky #'s are 3,6,12,23,26, and 42... 42 has always been good to me. I hope you don't have to eat those cookies for the fortune to come true.. they taste like crap and I just crumble them up and throw them under the table. But anyway.. the good news is golden eggs of opportunity.. and they'll just fall conveniently into my lap. sweet.

Speaking of strange fortunes and destinies and such. Here is an interesting presidential tidbit that I like to throw around. Arguably the 3 greatest presidents were: Washington, Lincoln and FDR who were elected in the following years: Washington 1788, Lincoln 1860, FDR 1932: Notice each 72 years apart??? Did you notice???? Ok 72 years after 1932 is??? thats right 2004... John Kerry? maybe?

Otherwise I was thinking yesterday about how much its going to suck when my sister gets married. I mean I want her to get married and be happy, I just dread the family gatherings, and I know she's going to get married soon. I haven't seen my dad in 5 years. Shit. I'm a total wedding dodger, I haven't been to a wedding since 1989, which was my mom's wedding to my stepdad. I've been invited to a bunch of weddings but none of my close friends have gotten married. I just have contempt for rituals, I avoid them at all costs, and mock them when I'm in there presence. My mom says I'm not aloud into Transfiguration Catholic Church anymore.. we had fun though didn't we, Gail? *wink* *wink* lol

current mood: mischievous

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Tuesday, August 10th, 2004
4:05 pm - We are all Doomed!!!
Update on that nasty arachnid prowling on our front porch.... it has procreated... a collasal-sized eggpod rests noosed to the ceiling above our door.

Bill Clinton was on the Daily Show last night, he had this to say about Dems winning elections..

"we want people to think, when people think we'll win every time".

I'm becoming a total partisan democrat, but I think its a healthy state at least until Nov 3.

current mood: groggy

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2:39 pm - hesitations..............
So, I spewed out some BS last week about daily journal entries.. we all knew it wasn't going to happen.. i mean come on.. seriously people. Lets get with it. My brother stayed over last night, and I treated his innocent 11 year old self to about 10 episodes of south park which is probably irresponsible, but I love seeing him laugh, he's a rather moody kid, just like big brother. I just go out of my way to not explain too much to him. He really doesn't need to know why JFK, Adolf Hitler, and Princess Di are all facing eternal damnation together, or what a crack whore is... these are things that he has to find out through experience like the rest of us. any way.. we stayed up all night.. i'm showered, dressed, monkey suit on and ready to go out the door.. just need a push.. Alright you bastards, I'm leaving..

current mood: tired

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Thursday, August 5th, 2004
4:03 pm - Bushism of the Day
Here's a quote from our president today at a defense bill signing.

"Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we."

Perhaps he got off the subject of defense and decided to talk about his domestic policy.

current mood: giggly

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1:40 am - Look at that Big Fucker!!!!!
It isn't safe to leave our apartment at night. There is a bulbous, swollen, fangtoothed 667 pound demon spider lurking menacingly above our front door, and I know if I so much as open the door, Robb is going to find my dried out husk webbed to the ceiling above our stairway in the morning. Yesterday there were 6 very scary big spiders, sometime within the last 24 hours these 6 engaged in some kind of arachnid gladatorial battle after which this big fucker canabalized the other 5 and grew to its current monstrous proportions. I'm staying in.

In slightly less sinister news Bush and Kerry today campaigned within blocks of each other in Davenport, Iowa. Due to the strain this caused on area police there were also three bank robberies!!! LOL

After a harrowing stint of job hunting early in the day, I sat down with my brother Trevor, an O.G. Nintendo, and hooked it up with some Super Mario 3. I haven't played this game in like 15 years, it was sick how all the secrets, and controls immediately came back to me. I kicked ass. Koopa turtles, and flying mushroom beasts beware!!

current mood: scared

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Wednesday, August 4th, 2004
2:14 am - Drawing Parallels and Vague Ambitions
I've decided to make an effort to make an entry on a daily basis. We'll see how it goes. My theory is that if I have to make an entry every night, it will force me to do something worth writing about during the day. Lately, I've felt an overwhelming need to make some kind of real difference in the world. I fear becoming a spoke in a wheel. I want to be the one pushing the wheel, or throwing it or dropping it or something.. it doesn't even have to be a big wheel... The biggest myth about Joe is that he doesn't care about anything. I know I need to put my money (lol) where my mouth is, but I just feel so paralyzed sometimes. I know I'm being very vague in how I plan to do this, but I'm thinking politics, journalism, art, film, activism *cringe*......I need a plan. Any suggestions?

The last month has been kind of interesting by recent standards. I had a short web-based fling, that resulted in a bus trip to Missouri. It crashed and burned. I had a job last week, but decided to quit. Talking with Robb the other night I drew parallels between this job, and a relatively uncomely girl I had a fling with about 4 years ago. It boosted my confidence to be having sex again, but while it was happening I started thinking about how much better I could do, so I dumped her. I felt really bad though.. I don't want to sound like a total ass.

Here's a fucked up fact I stumbled upon today. We here in Illinois District 8 have the longest running GOP Congressman in Phil Crane whose been in office since 1969. His office is right down the street. Our previous Congressman was Secretary of Defense, Donald Rumsfeld. I had no idea. Rumsfeld left his house seat after being apointed to a position in the Nixon Administration in 1968.

Happy Yesterday Birthday Myndcraft!!! I hope you had a swell day.

current mood: restless

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Wednesday, June 30th, 2004
2:22 am - Amazing George Orwell Quote Used in F-911
"In accordance with the principles of double-think it does not matter if the war is not real. For when it is, victory is not possible. The war is not meant to be won, but it is meant to be continuous.

The essential fact of modern warfare is the destruction of the produce of human labour. The hierarchy of society is only possible on the basis of poverty and ignorance.

In principle the war effort is always planned to keep society on the brink of starvation. The war is waged by the ruling group against its own subjects, and its object is not victory over Eurasia, or East Asia, but to keep the very structure of society intact."

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Saturday, June 5th, 2004
7:00 pm - f911
Nothing makes me more happy than having this movie come out right before the election...


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Friday, May 21st, 2004
10:45 pm - 1994

In response to my roommates "1996" mix.... I bring you....

George Orwell's ....  1994

A far stronger year, grunge wasn't dead yet and ska wasn't popular. I abhore ska, if I ever meet The Mighty Mighty Bosstones in person... well... it will be on.. thats all I'm saying (ahem)... anyway here it is so far.. "



Meat Puppets - Backwater

Nirvana - All Apologies

NIN - Closer

Sheryl Crow - All I wanna do

Beastie Boys - Sabotage

Elastica - Connection

Green Day - Longview

Crash Test Dummies - MMM MMM MMM

Zombie - Cranberries

R.E.M. - What's the Frequency Kenneth?

Sound Garden - Spoon Man

Hole - Miss World

Pavement - Cut your Hair

Beck - Loser

Smashing Pumkins - Disarm

Stone Temple Pilots - Big Empty

The Breeders - Driving Hammer

Pearl Jam - Corduroy

Alice in Chains - Got me Wrong

Weezer - Buddy Holly

Sonic Youth - Superstar

Oasis - Live Forever

Lisa Loeb - Stay

Blur - Girls and Boys

Jewel - Save your soul

The Flaming Lips - She Don't use Jelly


I'm keeping strictly to a one song per band rule, but I'm definately taking suggestions before burning the final product.   Anyone interesting in purchasing this album can contact me at.. damn! that would probably be illegal, wouldn't it. 

current mood: nostalgic

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Sunday, May 16th, 2004
4:55 pm - Devil's Haircut
So during my job hunting routine I'm finding more and more ways the man has found to screw me. CREDIT CHECKS on Job applications!, fuck that noise. My credit is an abomination, I couldn't be trusted borrowing a quarter from my Grandma. But the funny thing is they asked for ALL addresses that I've lived at in the last 7 years. Now, technically I've only been tracked to a few, but my temptation is honesty. Lets see, since 1997: Island Lake-Dekalb-Palatine-Dekalb-Urbana-Wauconda-Champaign-Toronto-Wauconda.. they only give 3 lines. What a horrible thing for people already screwed by debt. Lets make it harder for them to get a good job so they can pay it off.

In related news, my hair is now very very short. There will be no picture update though, I remain stubbornly longhaired in spirit.

current mood: mischievous

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Monday, May 3rd, 2004
12:09 pm - Hit by a Bus
Ok, hitting the town Monday isn't happening, I have a throbbing headache, and I'm still drunk. 11 beers after eating only a ham sandwich all day is devastating. Goddamn I hate Guinness, I can't believe I took down 3 cans of that flat wheaty piss. Just give me a 30 pack of Old Style, Ice House, or Schlitz, or rat urine. All the pain is worth it though, it was the most enjoyable drinking night I've had in a long time.

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